Seeing a therapist does not mean you are weak. Being vulnerable in front of a complete stranger can be uncomfortable although therapy is more than sitting in an office or from home and talking. Therapy includes building a professional, therapeutic relationship with boundaries and setting goals you want to achieve. The client-therapist relationship is a collaborative relationship. The therapist listens, ask questions and evaluates your needs, barriers and challenges. As well, you listen, ask questions and identify your needs, barriers and challenges. If you cannot identify your needs, barriers or challenges, that's okay! Your therapist has many years of experience and should be able to help you.
Unfortunately, therapeutic relationships can be unbalanced. Although finding a therapist that's a right fit for you can be hard, it can be done. Be encouraged! You don't want to stay in any client-therapist relationship that isn't serving you or its purpose. If you decide to leave your current therapist for a new one, be empowered by the fact that you can now use that past experience to your advantage by knowing what to look for in your new therapist. In addition, keep these 5 things in mind:
Do you find yourself physically living in the present, but your mind is in the past?
Are you sitting in resentment, guilt, or shame from the past?
Are your current circumstances causing you such displeasure that you think they'll continue in your future?
The voice of the ego-mind makes us believe we can only achieve internal peace based on external things. The philosopher, Ludwig Wittgenstein stated, “The eternal life belongs to those who live in the present.” When you don't allow yourself to experience any moment for itself, you stop time.
The past is said and done. What remains to be seen is what you can bring to your present and future. You always have the power to not repeat any poor decision you made in the past so it doesn't repeat in your present or future.
You owe it to yourself to treat yourself fairly! This includes not beating yourself up over your past, what someone did to you that wasn't in your control and anything you did without knowing how to respond better.
Today, tell yourself that you are important because you matter! Please know that no matter how others may have treated you or what they may have told you in the past is a reflection of them and not you.
Your past represents the things you've experienced. Your past does not make you a better or worse person nor is it your enemy. The enemy is your way of thinking about your past and if you allow it to ruin your present and future. Use your past to make you emotionally strong now for your future.
Let’s face it; the present can only get better for the future!